The strange case of increasing suicides among youth in India

(Image Source: Indiadaily.org)

“I was weak, I thought I could be strong but I was weak! I was so so weak, the fault is my own. Hope something good happens with my death. I have left the building”

These are not words from a Chetan Bhagat best seller though I wish they were.

These were the last words of Nitin Kumar Reddy before he flung himself from his hostel roof at IIT Madras.

As India celebrates year on year economic growth we have started putting a lot of pressure on our youth. In our rush to win we have crushed the hopes and aspirations of our youth. We have started a race to win at all costs.

In 2009, almost 3000 children below the age of 14 committed suicide. If we look at the 15-25 age group the number jumps to 50,000. But the scariest statistic is that for every successful suicide there are almost 14 unsuccessful attempts.

Clearly the youth of our country are in distress.
But the symptoms are there to see

• Toddlers are made to compete in talent shows.
• Teenagers are entering singing and dancing competitions
• High school students go through a grueling schedule to balance school curriculum with preparation for entrances to elite institutions like the IITs.

Who is responsible for this? Who killed Nitin?

Some people might say it is the system that is responsible for this, but aren’t we responsible for creating this system. We are forever drawing comparisons between our children and the others and this is just leading to a unsustainable situation.
Is this what we have been reduced to? Is that what we want? To compete and win at all costs.

A recent survey showed that almost 85% of parents in urban India do not allow children to take up professions of their choice. This is probably the greatest reason for stress among India’s youth, being stuck in professions that they don’t enjoy or are not suited for.

Like I said we all know what the symptoms are, but the challenge is to treat the disease and not the symptom. How can we change the situation for our children and the youth of tomorrow? I propose these four steps.

1. Identify- The key is to listen, observe and identify activities that the kids enjoy and are attracted to. Which activity draws them more, what they enjoy doing?

2. Analyze- based on our observations, we need to map the activities and likes of the child to sustainable careers that that activity can sustain. If we are not experts in that field, there is a high possibility that there is someone in our network that will know someone. Also councilors both in school and outside can be used for the same.

3. Decide- Once the mapping has been done, we can decide on a few career choices of the child’s liking and also something where his passion lies.

4. Monitor- Once the decision has been made it is important to monitor the children. Often they grow and once they grow their preferences change, it is important to monitor those changes and incorporate that into their plan.

People are usually very good at what they do, once they enjoy it. A good example is cricketer Sachin Tendulkar who enjoys cricket and has been the best for the last 20 years..

I am reminded of a quote as I end this piece-

“Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate; our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure
It is our light and not our darkness that frightens us.”

Our children think of us are heroes, let’s be the light that guides them.